Thursday, July 8, 2010

Glenmoor, Oh Glenmoor

A while back I attended a little poetry night with a few neighbor friends. Each guest was required to present an original poem, and seeing as how I didn't have my junior high diary handy in which I had several dramatic rhyming tragedies recorded for posterity, I feverishly wrote this poem. I'm posting it here upon request from those who heard it, who want to relive my childhood with me over and over again. Enjoy:

Glenmoor, Oh Glenmoor

It didn’t take me long to choose
For my poetic entry
Short stories from my childhood
At Glenmoor elementary.

Our principal had a Gerry curl
And smoked two packs a day
Yet somehow wooed a married teacher,
Resigned and ran away.

Our music teacher hated kids,
Bragged Gershwin was her homie
But judging by her singing voice
That story was baloney.

I was the whitest little girl
There was or ever has been
Still I learned me some double dutch
From Shayna, Kelly and Jasmine.

When it came to bullies
I refused to pay my dues.
I once gave one a bloody nose
When he attempted to abuse.

One day my lunch was stolen though,
they even took my glasses.
Had I known the thieves behind the heist
I would have kicked their @$$&$

Janitor Dave was a frowny man
With a significant stalker ‘stache
But I really liked him after he fished
my retainer from the trash.

Our playground boasted rusty slides
And swings with broken chains
Nestled in a neighborhood
Oft frequented by gangs.

My education was unique,
A crazy one at that
Yet still I’m proud to call myself
A Glenmoor Wildcat.



    i love this so much.
    ps i'm kinda pissed youve been lacking in blog posting frequency. so SHAPE UP

  2. I couldn't agree more with Nicole. Come ON Kristin!!! Some of us LOVE reading your blogs. So cut that slacking crap off!!!! Seriously though, I loved your poem. I miss you more than a fat kid misses his mom's homemade pie at fat camp. (Cake is so over rated with that saying!)

  3. This is hilarious and really impressive. I luff your blog.

  4. I'm going to have to frame that poem.

  5. You are my hero.

    And that reminded me of my favorite story of yourse "Oh no you did NOT just THROW my lasaaagna in the dirt!!!"

    Well, maybe not my favorite, but definitely one of those with the best impressions.