Glenmoor, Oh Glenmoor

A while back I attended a little poetry night with a few neighbor friends. Each guest was required to present an original poem, and seeing as how I didn't have my junior high diary handy in which I had several dramatic rhyming tragedies recorded for posterity, I feverishly wrote this poem. I'm posting it here upon request from those who heard it, who want to relive my childhood with me over and over again. Enjoy:


Glenmoor, Oh Glenmoor


It didn’t take me long to choose
For my poetic entry
Short stories from my childhood
At Glenmoor elementary.

Our principal had a Gerry curl
And smoked two packs a day
Yet somehow wooed a married teacher,
Resigned and ran away.

Our music teacher hated kids,
Bragged Gershwin was her homie
But judging by her singing voice
That story was baloney.

I was the whitest little girl
There was or ever has been
Still I learned me some double dutch
From Shayna, Kelly and Jasmine.

When it came to bullies
I refused to pay my dues.
I once gave one a bloody nose
When he attempted to abuse.

One day my lunch was stolen though,
they even took my glasses.
Had I known the thieves behind the heist
I would have kicked their @$$&$

Janitor Dave was a frowny man
With a significant stalker ‘stache
But I really liked him after he fished
my retainer from the trash.

Our playground boasted rusty slides
And swings with broken chains
Nestled in a neighborhood
Oft frequented by gangs.

My education was unique,
A crazy one at that
Yet still I’m proud to call myself
A Glenmoor Wildcat.