Oh Mommy.

So... We found out on Sept 23rd that Mama Booth has cancer. I may have alluded to it in the past, but here I am just coming right out and saying it. I hate it. I hate cancer. It's not so much that I'm feeling "oh poor me!" but more like what the deuce does cancer think its doing, trying to take down my Mom.

She is a rock. She's the one being bombarded, and she's not even scared. She's handling it like a champ. I'm the one who isn't handling it well, but I'm doing my best. I'm not angry with deity or anything like that. I'm angry at cancer. If cancer were a guy, I would unapologetically knee him in the crotch. If cancer were riding a bike, I would poke a stick through the tire spokes and laugh as it hit the ground. Even if cancer were a puppy, I would punch it the face. Its okay to hate a disease right? I'm pretty sure its okay.

I don't know how many of you know my mom, but she is a saint. She's selfless. She's hilarious and I hate that I'm not going to be in K-town to take care of her when she's sick. That is my biggest problem with the whole situation. She has angelically raised 5 little girls for the last 25 years and been there whenever any of us needed her. Now we're all scattered all over the place and it's not fair. She deserves to be pampered. I know I'll never be able to pay back my parents for all they have given me in life. I would do anything they asked me to do, but I'm not even going to be able to do anything for my mom while she's sick.

Every time I think about it I get that blasted little pinching feeling in my nose right before I start crying. And then I usually start crying. I'm such a freaking baby. Its not fair. And I'm not saying its not fair to me. Its just not fair to my mom. She has always gone out of her way to make other people feel comfortable, to cheer them up when they are sad and nurse them back to health when they are sick. I just wish she could still have a houseful of daughters to wait on her.